Trust me, you’re not alone.
Picture the scene. You’re mindlessly scrolling through Facebook, looking for something, anything to take your mind of that feeling. You know the one. The gnawing in your tummy that tells you there’s something you’re avoiding.
Often there’s an inner voice, narrating alongside the gnawing. It might be a whisper or a shout, a sneer or a weary sigh. But chances are, it’ll be reminding you over, and over of all the things you ‘should’ be doing right now.
Walking the dog. Homeschooling the kids. Doing the ironing. Applying for a job.
From the biggest task to smallest chore, why does everything seem so daunting right now?
Take this blog post. It took me days to even start writing it. ‘The irony,’ I thought, flicking listlessly past yet another funny WhatsApp video.
So what is it about being in a state of Coronavirus lockdown that makes us all feel so, well, unmotivated? And what can we do about it?
Firstly, if your ‘get up and go’ feels like it’s got up and gone, know that you are not alone. Also know that no matter how uncomfortable it might feel, that lethargic, somewhat ‘foggy’ emotional response many of us are having, actually kind of makes sense.
If you imagine our ordinary daily lives as a film being projected onto a cinema screen, then the COVID-19 pandemic and ensuing lockdown has effectively acted like the pushing of a huge ‘pause’ button. The world as we know it, with its supporting structures of work, finance, family, and relationships – have all been put on hold. It’s as though we are frozen and waiting, in suspended animation, for the great pause button to be released and the film to resume once again.Yet while the greater narrative of our daily lives may be paused, the reality is – life does go on. We still have to get up and face the day, every day, while trying to make sense of the often terrifying feelings this strange new world evokes.
Be in no doubt, we are living through a time of profound upheaval and social trauma. People are living in daily fear of losing everything – their loved ones, their livelihoods, their homes. As we struggle to come to terms with a crisis of unimaginable scale, a terrible toll is taken on our nervous system. When even a trip to the corner shop could endanger our health, we live in a state of hypervigilance, ever watchful lest anything threaten our safety or that of those we love. And when the fear, and anxiety, and panic becomes overwhelming, that’s when we can flip into shutdown. Our minds fog, our bodies numb. Feeling utterly powerless to change our situation, we become stuck. Wanting, yet somehow not feeling able to move forward.
And yet, in that stuckness there is some comfort. For in a world where nothing is certain and change is rapid, if I am stuck, right here, at least I am safe. I know where I am. So rather than asking – how can I get my motivation back? Perhaps another question may be helpful – am I able to show myself kindness and compassion right now, and trust that one day I will once again feel safe enough to come ‘unstuck’?
Photo by elCarito